roller coaster

Yesterday, I met with a divorced mother who is really struggling. She has two children who don't respect her authority or her advice as a mother. As I sat across the table from her, tears pouring out of her eyes, all she would say was, "why doesn't my daughter treat me better?...doesn't she understand that she is hurting me?..."

How many of us out there find ourselves in similar situations? We base our lives on the success of plans that are subject to people and circumstances, riding this long, emotional roller coaster. One key to successful living is learning to distinguish a godly goal from a godly desire.

A godly goal is any specific orientation reflecting God's purpose for your life. It does not depend on people or circumstances beyond your control. Who do you have the ability and right to control? Virtually no one but yourself. The only person who can block a godly goal or render it uncertain or impossible is you.

By contrast, a godly desire depends on the cooperation of other people or the success of events or favorable circumstances you cannot control. You cannot base your self worth or your personal success on your desires, no matter how godly they may be, because you cannot control all the people or circumstances that affect fulfillment.

When people or circumstances block our goals, we get angry. If our mentally perceived goal is uncertain, we feel anxious. If the goal appears impossible (such as the example above), we get depressed. But what God-given goal can be blocked, uncertain, or impossible? With God all things are possible, and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. No one can keep us from being what God wants us to be except us.

The only way to get off the roller coaster is to walk by faith according to the truth of God's Word. Who you are must not be dependent on the cooperation of others or favorable circumstances. Decide to be the parent, leader, spouse, co-worker, or friend God wants you to be. No one can block that goal except you.

Has [God] said, and will He not do it? Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?
~Numbers 23:19